Y\u0131llar \u00f6nce kendimi yaln\u0131z, k\u0131r\u0131k, \u00f6ks\u00fcz, el gibi \u00e7\u0131r\u0131l\u00e7\u0131plak hissetti\u011fim bir gece de, elleri \u00f6p\u00fclesi anneme \u00d6mer Ahmet mahlas\u0131 ile yazd\u0131\u011f\u0131m yaz\u0131m\u0131, ayn\u0131 hisleri ta\u015f\u0131yan insanlar olarak her zamanki gibi \u2018\u2018HATIRAM OLSUN\u2019\u2019 diyerek sizlerle payla\u015fmak istiyorum.
En Derin Sevgilerimle..<\/p>\n\n\n\n
ANACI\u011eIM;<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Do\u011furdun beni haceverada
k\u00f6rkaranl\u0131k bir gecede
onalt\u0131 ya\u015f\u0131nda ise \u0130stanbul\u2019a sald\u0131n beni
ama inan g\u00f6be\u011fimi kopard\u0131\u011f\u0131nda,
bu kadar can\u0131m yanmam\u0131\u015ft\u0131.
bu y\u00fczden belki, y\u00fcz\u00fcm g\u00f6z\u00fcm k\u0131r\u0131k dola\u015f\u0131r\u0131m hala.
avu\u00e7lar dolusu a\u011flad\u0131m yaln\u0131zl\u0131\u011f\u0131mda pek belli etmeden.
ama en \u00e7ok babam buza\u011f\u0131m\u0131 kesti\u011finde a\u011flam\u0131\u015ft\u0131m.
\u015fimdi bunlar nerden \u00e7\u0131kt\u0131 deme bana, hep konu\u015fmak istemi\u015fimdir y\u0131llar y\u0131l\u0131
ama olmad\u0131; belki de kalabal\u0131k s\u00fclale olman\u0131n bedeli.
bir sofrada kahvalt\u0131ya doyamad\u0131m anac\u0131\u011f\u0131m, b\u0131rak da konu\u015fay\u0131m.
belki de \u00f6lesim gelmi\u015f kimbilir b\u0131rakta a\u011flayay\u0131m.
burada insanlar araba ve elbise markalar\u0131n\u0131 ezberler
ben ayr\u0131l\u0131klar\u0131,
kimileri yazl\u0131\u011fa gitmeyi \u00f6zler
bense g\u00fcbre kokulu anama kavu\u015fmay\u0131.
kendimi k\u0131z\u0131l a\u011fa\u00e7lar aras\u0131nda kaybediyorum zaman zaman
ba\u015f\u0131ma sard\u0131\u011f\u0131n topra\u011f\u0131n kokusunu vuruyor anam
anac\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u2026.
Anac\u0131\u011f\u0131m bilirsin \u00dcniversiteyi Almanya\u2019daki eni\u015ftemin
Paras\u0131yla bitirdim.
D\u00fczensiz harcamalar\u0131m\u0131 da bilirsin a\u00e7 kald\u0131m zaman zaman
Ama onursuz hi\u00e7bir zaman
Hi\u00e7bir zaman da g\u00fccenmedim
Yedi b\u00f6lgeli \u00dclkeme
\u00e7ok k\u00fcf\u00fcr ettim onursuzlara, vazge\u00e7mem de etmekten.
d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcncelerimden dolay\u0131 \u00e7ok u\u011fra\u015ft\u0131lar benimle,
k\u00f6k\u00fc toprakta karayemi\u015f fidan\u0131 gibi direndim. Dimdik onurlu
iki kez silahl\u0131 sald\u0131r\u0131ya u\u011frad\u0131m.
a\u011fustos ay\u0131nda ise ekinler sarar\u0131rken do\u011fdu\u011fum \u015fehirde \u00f6ld\u00fcr\u00fcld\u00fcm.
be\u015f ya\u015f\u0131nda a\u015f\u0131k oldum, lisede ise \u00f6\u011fretmenime,
ablam\u0131n ve senin m\u00fcdahalene kadar.
velhas\u0131l \u00e7ok sevdim kad\u0131nlar\u0131 anac\u0131m, aldatt\u0131klar\u0131mda oldu aldat\u0131ld\u0131m da.
ama asla konu\u015fmad\u0131m arkalar\u0131ndan. Hele sana lacivert g\u00f6zl\u00fc torun veremedim ya
ben yine hay\u0131rs\u0131z o\u011flunum senin.
kimsenin \u00f6n\u00fcnde e\u011filmedi bu asi ba\u015f\u0131m.
bize ilkokulda \u00f6\u011fretti \u00f6\u011fretmenlerimiz Celal Bah\u00e7ekap\u0131l\u0131, Nuri Gazio\u011flu ve Orhan Yavuz.
ileriyi g\u00f6rmek i\u00e7in ba\u015f\u0131m\u0131z\u0131 hep dik tutmay\u0131 onlardan \u00f6\u011frendik.
bu y\u00fczden anac\u0131\u011f\u0131m, i\u015fte bu y\u00fczden g\u00fcne\u015fin bile \u00fcst\u00fcne y\u00fcr\u00fcd\u00fcm g\u00f6lgemi ge\u00e7mek i\u00e7in.
iyi de oldu anac\u0131\u011f\u0131m.Uzakta k\u0131r\u0131lan s\u00f6\u011f\u00fct dal\u0131n\u0131 g\u00f6rd\u00fcm,ac\u0131s\u0131n\u0131 da.
m\u0131s\u0131r p\u00fcsk\u00fcl\u00fcn\u00fcn r\u00fczgarda sal\u0131nmas\u0131n\u0131 seyrettim, bahtiyarl\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 da.
kar\u015f\u0131 yama\u00e7taki evde, do\u011fum sanc\u0131s\u0131ndan ve de fakirlikten tahtay\u0131 \u0131s\u0131ran kad\u0131n\u0131n ac\u0131s\u0131n\u0131 duydum
y\u00fcre\u011fim derinlemesine orta yerinden yar\u0131larak.
\u015fimdi gelelim sana.
beni iyi dinle koca \u00e7\u0131nar\u0131m.
Kemal Dursun, R\u00fc\u015ft\u00fc Araz iyi doktordur, ila\u00e7lar\u0131n\u0131 bir defa olsun saatinde al be anac\u0131\u011f\u0131m.
\u00f6yle kolay pes etmek yok ya\u015famda ayak direyece\u011fiz
ve kahretsin ki bu da bizim elimizde olan bir \u015fey anac\u0131m.
duydu\u011fuma g\u00f6re abimin resmini ah\u0131rda inekle buza\u011f\u0131n\u0131n aras\u0131na asm\u0131\u015fs\u0131n
benim koca kar\u0131c\u0131m. millet senin kara b\u0131y\u0131kl\u0131 o\u011fluna sevdan\u0131 bilemez,
g\u00fclecekler sana.
mektupdaki \u00fcz\u00fcn\u00e7lerimden babama bahsetme. Beni k\u0131rsa da y\u0131kamaz bu kirli \u015fehir.
hem kolay okuyas\u0131n diye b\u00fcy\u00fck harflerle yazd\u0131m
kolay\u0131na gelip de ablama okutma,
cumhuriyet kad\u0131n\u0131\u2026
evet anam yine kirpiklerim tuzland\u0131 m\u0131 ne?
galiba \u015fimdilik bu kadar.
seni ilkbaharda patlayan tohumun h\u0131\u015f\u0131rt\u0131s\u0131 kadar masum \u00f6p\u00fcyorum
ve kardelen \u00e7i\u00e7e\u011finin \u00f6zlemiyle kucakl\u0131yorum.
biliyorum bu son s\u00f6zlerimden bir\u015fey anlamad\u0131n
beni s\u00f6vd\u00fcrme ba\u015fl\u0131yorsun
o zaman
al sana,
anderun mastisi,
seni \u00e7oook seveyirum
hay\u0131rs\u0131z o\u011flun \u00d6mer Ahmet<\/p>\n\n\n\n
VOLKAN KONAK<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Y\u0131llar \u00f6nce kendimi yaln\u0131z, k\u0131r\u0131k, \u00f6ks\u00fcz, el gibi \u00e7\u0131r\u0131l\u00e7\u0131plak hissetti\u011fim bir gece de, elleri \u00f6p\u00fclesi anneme \u00d6mer Ahmet mahlas\u0131 ile yazd\u0131\u011f\u0131m yaz\u0131m\u0131, ayn\u0131 hisleri ta\u015f\u0131yan insanlar olarak her zamanki gibi \u2018\u2018HATIRAM OLSUN\u2019\u2019 diyerek sizlerle payla\u015fmak istiyorum.En Derin Sevgilerimle.. ANACI\u011eIM; Do\u011furdun beni haceveradak\u00f6rkaranl\u0131k bir gecedeonalt\u0131 ya\u015f\u0131nda ise \u0130stanbul\u2019a sald\u0131n beniama inan g\u00f6be\u011fimi kopard\u0131\u011f\u0131nda,bu kadar can\u0131m yanmam\u0131\u015ft\u0131.bu… Okumaya devam et Anac\u0131\u011f\u0131m<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[4],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-168","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-yazilarim","entry"],"acf":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/volkankonak.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/168","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/volkankonak.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/volkankonak.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/volkankonak.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/volkankonak.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=168"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/volkankonak.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/168\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":169,"href":"https:\/\/volkankonak.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/168\/revisions\/169"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/volkankonak.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=168"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/volkankonak.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=168"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/volkankonak.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=168"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}